My mum was diagnosed with cancer and my grandad passed away all in the space of one year. On top of that, I was burnt out and just fell deeper into a hole. It got to a point where I just had a breakdown. I remember the night before my grandad’s funeral; I looked in the mirror as I brushed my teeth and thought – tonight’s the night I’m going to end it.
Joe's story
Joe reached out to his charity when he was struggling with his mental health.
*Content warning – this story talks about suicide which some readers may find emotionally challenging. Reader's discretion is advised.
Content warning* some of the content in this story talks about suicide, which some readers may find emotionally challenging. Reader’s discretion is advised.
Joe has an incredibly high-pressured job at HMRC, where he takes great pride in being a civil servant and looking out for other people. But following a series of traumatic events last year, Joe’s wellbeing took a hit – and it was time for someone to look out for him.
Joe has had depression and suicidal thoughts since being a teenager. They come and go and overall, have been manageable. But Joe feels like he’s never faced his mental health head on until he reached out to the Charity.
Luckily Joe’s partner is a mental health first aider and was able to give him the right support at the time. The following few weeks were the turning point in Joe’s life.
I had a lot of support at work and my colleagues encouraged me to reach out to the Charity for Civil Servants for a wellbeing conversation. I was in full work mode and then the energy just completely changed when I joined the call, it was so calm. The person on the call guided my thoughts and helped me reflect in a way I’ve never done before. I felt like I lost my sense of identity and wasn’t sure what I was giving back…and that call helped me remember where I was adding value. That was really useful.
In addition to a wellbeing conversation, the Charity was able to give Joe access to the Thrive app, allowing Joe to access mental health support and talking therapy.
The Thrive App is really valuable. It put me in direct contact with qualified individuals who could support me, particularly on days when I was really struggling. It has a wealth of resources to help me understand why I may be feeling the way I am.
I know mental health isn’t binary and being up and down is like a wave. I know I’m quite high on that wave at the moment and they’ll be times when I feel down again – and that’s OK. I know the Charity is there for me if I need it in the future.
Joe is now ready to share his story with the hope of helping other civil servants who may be struggling in silence. He’s been helping and continues to help the Charity spread an important message – that serving, former and retired civil servants are part of a lifelong community who will always look out for each other.
I signpost my colleagues to the Charity because it’s personally helped me so much. If I hadn’t reached out, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I actually feel happy for the first time in years.
Not to be hyperbolic, but without the Charity, people could die – the help they provide is invaluable. Sometimes you feel like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, and the Charity felt like an actual light to me. An accessible, real light. General attitudes towards looking after our mental health are improving but accessibility to support is still challenging. By donating to the Charity for Civil Servants, it removes that barrier.
Some elements of this story have been anonymised or changed to protect the person’s identity.
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